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Naum Afanasyev
Naum Afanasyev

Were You Born An Asshole

Were You Born an Asshole or Did You Become One? A Guide to Self-Awareness and Improvement

Have you ever wondered why some people seem to act like assholes all the time? Do you think they were born that way or did they learn to be that way? Are you worried that you might be one of them?

were you born an asshole

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If you answered yes to any of these questions, then this article is for you. In this article, we will explore the possible causes and consequences of being an asshole, and how you can change your behavior and attitude for the better.

What is an asshole?

An asshole is someone who behaves in a rude, selfish, arrogant, or disrespectful way towards others. They may lie, cheat, manipulate, insult, bully, or hurt others without remorse. They may also act entitled, superior, or hostile towards anyone who challenges them or disagrees with them.

Some examples of asshole behavior are:

  • Cutting someone off on the road

  • Talking loudly on the phone in a quiet place

  • Interrupting someone who is speaking

  • Stealing someone's idea or credit

  • Making fun of someone's appearance or disability

  • Spreading rumors or gossip about someone

  • Ignoring someone's feelings or needs

  • Blaming someone else for their own mistakes

  • Taking advantage of someone's kindness or generosity

  • Breaking promises or commitments

Of course, everyone can act like an asshole once in a while, especially when they are stressed, angry, tired, or drunk. But some people seem to make a habit of it, and that's when it becomes a problem.

Why are some people assholes?

There is no definitive answer to why some people are assholes, but there are some possible factors that may contribute to it. These include:

  • Genetics: Some studies have suggested that there may be a genetic component to being an asshole. For example, some people may have lower levels of empathy, compassion, or emotional intelligence, which make them less able to understand and care about how others feel. Some people may also have higher levels of aggression, impulsivity, or narcissism, which make them more likely to act on their selfish impulses and disregard the consequences.

  • Environment: Some people may become assholes because of the way they were raised or the situations they faced in their lives. For example, some people may have grown up in abusive, neglectful, or chaotic households, where they learned to cope by being defensive, hostile, or manipulative. Some people may have experienced trauma, bullying, discrimination, or rejection, which made them feel insecure, angry, or resentful. Some people may have been influenced by negative role models, such as parents, peers, celebrities, or politicians, who modeled asshole behavior for them.

  • Choice: Some people may choose to be assholes because they think it gives them some advantages or benefits. For example, some people may think that being an asshole makes them look strong, confident, or cool. Some people may think that being an asshole helps them get what they want faster or easier. Some people may think that being an asshole protects them from getting hurt or exploited by others.

However, none of these factors can justify or excuse being an asshole. Being an asshole is not a fixed trait that you are born with or stuck with. Being an asshole is a behavior that you can change if you want to.

How to stop being an asshole?

If you have realized that you are being an asshole and you want to change, congratulations! That's the first and most important step. Acknowledging your problem and taking responsibility for it is the key to making positive changes in your life.

But how do you actually stop being an asshole? Here are some tips that may help you:

  • Practice empathy: Empathy is the ability to put yourself in someone else's shoes and understand how they feel. It's the opposite of being an asshole. To practice empathy, try to imagine how your words and actions affect others. How would you feel if someone said or did the same thing to you? How would you want to be treated in their situation? Try to be more compassionate and respectful towards others, even if you disagree with them or don't like them.

  • Think before you speak: One of the main traits of assholes is that they blurt out whatever comes to their mind, without considering the consequences. They may think they are being honest or funny, but they are actually being rude or hurtful. To avoid this, try to pause and think before you say anything. Ask yourself: Is this true? Is this necessary? Is this kind? If the answer is no to any of these questions, don't say it.

  • Apologize when you're wrong: Another trait of assholes is that they never admit their mistakes or apologize for them. They may blame others, make excuses, or deny their wrongdoing. This only makes them look more arrogant and untrustworthy. To break this habit, try to own up to your mistakes and apologize sincerely when you're wrong. Say what you did wrong, why it was wrong, how it affected others, and what you will do differently in the future. Don't make it about yourself or expect forgiveness right away.

  • Learn from feedback: Assholes often ignore or reject any feedback that doesn't match their self-image or agenda. They may think they know everything, or that everyone else is stupid or biased. This prevents them from learning and growing as a person. To overcome this, try to listen to feedback with an open mind and a curious attitude. Don't take it personally or defensively. Try to understand where it's coming from and what you can learn from it. Thank the person for their feedback and use it to improve yourself.

  • Seek help if needed: Sometimes being an asshole is a symptom of a deeper issue, such as low self-esteem, insecurity, anger issues, trauma, mental illness, or addiction. If you feel like you can't control your asshole behavior or that it's affecting your life negatively, don't be afraid to seek professional help. There are therapists, counselors, coaches, support groups, and other resources that can help you deal with your underlying problems and develop healthier coping skills.

Remember that being an asshole is not a permanent condition. You can change if you want to and if you work on it. It may not be easy or quick, but it will be worth it. You will feel better about yourself and have better relationships with others. You will also make the world a better place by not being an asshole.

What are the benefits of not being an asshole?

Now that you know how to stop being an asshole, you may wonder why you should bother. After all, being an asshole may seem like a convenient way to get your way, vent your frustration, or protect your ego. But in reality, being an asshole has many drawbacks and disadvantages that outweigh any perceived benefits. Here are some of the benefits of not being an asshole:

  • You will have better relationships: Being an asshole can damage your relationships with others. You may lose friends, alienate family members, or create enemies. You may also miss out on opportunities to meet new people, network, or collaborate. By not being an asshole, you will improve your communication, trust, and respect with others. You will also attract more positive and supportive people into your life.

  • You will have better health: Being an asshole can harm your health. You may experience more stress, anger, anxiety, or depression. You may also have higher blood pressure, heart rate, or inflammation. You may also engage in unhealthy behaviors, such as smoking, drinking, or overeating. By not being an asshole, you will reduce your negative emotions and increase your positive ones. You will also have more motivation and self-control to take care of yourself.

  • You will have better performance: Being an asshole can impair your performance. You may make more mistakes, miss deadlines, or lose customers. You may also have lower creativity, productivity, or quality. You may also face more conflicts, complaints, or lawsuits. By not being an asshole, you will enhance your skills, knowledge, and abilities. You will also have more cooperation, feedback, and recognition.

  • You will have better reputation: Being an asshole can ruin your reputation. You may lose respect, credibility, or influence. You may also have a bad image, bad reviews, or bad press. You may also face more criticism, backlash, or boycotts. By not being an asshole, you will build your reputation as a reliable, ethical, and likable person. You will also have more referrals, testimonials, and endorsements.

  • You will have better happiness: Being an asshole can diminish your happiness. You may feel more guilt, shame, or regret. You may also have lower self-esteem, self-worth, or self-confidence. You may also have less meaning, purpose, or fulfillment in your life. By not being an asshole, you will increase your happiness by living in alignment with your values and principles. You will also have more gratitude, compassion, and generosity.

As you can see, not being an asshole has many benefits for yourself and others. It's not only the right thing to do but also the smart thing to do. By not being an asshole, you will enjoy a better quality of life and make the world a better place.

How to deal with assholes?

Not being an asshole is a great way to improve your life, but it doesn't mean that you won't encounter any assholes along the way. Unfortunately, assholes are everywhere, and you may have to deal with them at some point. Whether it's a coworker, a boss, a family member, a friend, or a stranger, dealing with assholes can be stressful, frustrating, and exhausting.

So how do you deal with assholes without losing your sanity or dignity? Here are some tips that may help you:

  • Maintain your physical distance: If possible, avoid being in close proximity to assholes. This will reduce your exposure to their negativity and toxicity. It will also prevent you from overhearing their rude or hurtful comments, which may trigger your emotions or lower your mood. If you can't avoid them completely, try to limit your contact with them as much as possible.

  • Don't be quick to judge: Sometimes, people may act like assholes because they are going through a tough time or have a valid reason for their behavior. They may be stressed, angry, tired, or sick. They may have personal problems, such as family issues, financial troubles, or health concerns. They may also have different values, beliefs, or opinions than you. Try to be empathetic and understanding of their situation and perspective. Don't take their behavior personally or assume that they are intentionally trying to hurt you.

  • Don't engage or escalate: One of the worst things you can do when dealing with assholes is to argue with them or try to change them. This will only make them more defensive and aggressive, and waste your time and energy. Instead of engaging or escalating the conflict, try to ignore them or walk away from them. Don't give them the satisfaction of getting a reaction from you or provoking you into a fight. Keep your cool and stay calm.

  • Set boundaries and enforce consequences: If ignoring or walking away from assholes is not an option, you need to set clear boundaries and enforce consequences for their behavior. For example, you can tell them that you will not tolerate their insults, interruptions, or interruptions. You can also tell them that if they continue to act like assholes, you will report them to a higher authority, end the conversation, or cut off the relationship. Be firm and consistent with your boundaries and consequences.

  • Seek support and help: Dealing with assholes can be emotionally draining and mentally exhausting. You don't have to do it alone. Seek support and help from people who care about you and who can empathize with you. Talk to your friends, family members, colleagues, or mentors about your situation and how you feel. They may offer you advice, comfort, or encouragement. They may also help you cope with stress, anger, or sadness.

Remember that dealing with assholes is not a reflection of your worth or character. You are not responsible for their behavior or happiness. You are only responsible for yourself and how you choose to respond to them. By following these tips, you can deal with assholes in a mature and respectful way.


In this article, we have discussed the topic of "were you born an asshole?" We have explored the possible causes and consequences of being an asshole, and how to stop being one. We have also shared some tips on how to deal with assholes in your life. We hope that this article has been helpful and informative for you. Remember that being an asshole is not a permanent condition. You can change if you want to and if you work on it. It may not be easy or quick, but it will be worth it. You will feel better about yourself and have better relationships with others. You will also make the world a better place by not being an asshole. d282676c82'LINK'.md


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